‘MTV Girl Code’ (2004) ⏩

It helps to have realistic expectations. You are not going to meet someone you are drawn to and willing to date within two weeks of going online. Dating is a slow process, and it can take a long time, too. What’s more, online dating is likely to be lonely and unfulfilling for you. If you’re hoping to find a relationship, that’s a prerequisite, but if you’re just looking for casual fun, online dating is a great first step.

To be honest, I’m not a big fan of online dating. I think it’s a great idea that makes it easier for people to meet and potentially be interested in each other—but there’s also a world of possible cruelties and disappointment. I’ve met people on websites who have turned out to be toxic and less than charming. I’ve had friends tell me about their failed dates—and let’s be honest, I haven’t done a whole lot of dating to have a lot of failed dates.

And yet, it is impossible for me to ignore the fact that using online dating tools has become the only way most of us meet the opposite sex. If you’re looking for a relationship, you’ll probably have to try it. That said, consider the following before deciding to jump into online dating.

Can you live with yourself if you do poorly at it?

Online dating is kind of like a game of Twenty Questions. What are you going to say? Why were you rejected? If you’re not good at it, you’re probably going to reveal things you wouldn’t normally reveal—like the number of times you’ve thought about having sex that day.

But most people are just trying to find a little pleasure or a few hours of entertainment. Unfortunately, when you’re out of context, what you say can look bad. I mean, you say something like “Hey, baby, let’s do a little dentistry—maybe even a little light bondage too. I’m very skilled and have plenty of time to get you all hot and bothered.” And then your date isn’t interested. Then, you’re embarrassed. And probably angry.

So you’re not sure if you can live with yourself if you fail at online dating. That’s a good question to ask yourself. I know I can’t. Sure, it’s not ideal to be rejected, but how much worse could it be to not even get a date—especially if you’re not going to improve your chances by messing up your online https://www.christians-dating-info.com/is_there_christian_adult_hookup_-_get_laid_in_the_west_and_europe.html

“I don’t believe in dating just because you’re broke,” says Erica A. Jenner, a relationship coach and founder of Love and Money Coaching. “But the odds of landing a relationship will be better if you have money because [you’ll be] more appealing to men.”

A few suggestions:

1. Invest in a good camera. “It’s very helpful to be able to show yourself to the person you’re dating,” says Jenifer O’Neill, a dating expert, sexuality educator, and author of My Big Fat Sex Change. “You don’t want to waste your time with someone who clearly has low self-esteem and no self-image.”

2. Invest in good clothes. “Dressing well is part of what people do to make themselves feel more confident,” Jenner explains. “The nicer you look, the better impression you make on a first date.” She also suggests that you dress in the colors you feel most confident in: “The most powerful color to wear is the one that you feel most vibrant in,” she says. “It’s important to feel beautiful and fabulous.”

3. Look professional. You don’t need to be a fashion-forward fashionista; just wear something that shows you care about your appearance. “In a world of rampant abundance and rampant consumption, when we are looking for others to appreciate us we have to make sure we’re treated as well as our possessions,” says O’Neill. “It’s about owning the best version of ourselves rather than the prettiest version.”

4. Express your confidence. “One thing that can get in your way is being in denial about your attractiveness,” says O’Neill. “You can feel more confident if you think about who you are instead of who you’re not. You have to be conscious and aware of your own looks and what your strengths are.”

5. Be a little shy. Jenner explains: “Acting too much like a’shy bunny’ can just seem weird. That might lead a man to think you’re not serious.” The trick is to “minimally reveal yourself.”

6. Be confident. “The trick to being successful and not being needy or whiney or overly aggressive or pushy is to walk in with a very composed sense of yourself,” says O’Neill. “Be your own confident self, and that can only go a long way.”

7. Don’t panic! “It’s all about being relaxed


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